


Keeping promises

by DrowningDutchman



Category: Jojo Rabbit (2019)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Reincarnation, World War II, finding each other, jojo is like 85, making things nicer for everyone involved, that knife, yes I went for alliteration because I am a dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:15:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22380061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrowningDutchman/pseuds/DrowningDutchman
Summary: Not technically a sequel to my last work, but the last bit they had together inspired my dumb ass.Freddy is plagued by recuring dreams and memories from the time he could not even be alive in. Then he finds someone who experiences the same.They are both confused, but have a strong connection that has apparently lasted longer than a lifetime.
Relationships: Freddy Finkel/Captain Klenzendorf
Comments: 6
Kudos: 106





	Keeping promises

The dreams never stopped.

Freddy had no idea what the dreams meant or even if there was any meaning to the dreams, but it seemed like it was something that was going to follow him forever.

The dreams always started the same. It was a town, a small town, like where he lived now. It was in complete ruins. There were always sounds of chaos all around. There was a man standing in the rubble and as he made his way over to the man the sounds of chaos stopped. The man turned around and Freddy always noticed that the man’s right eye seemed to be blind. He wasn’t hostile, as he always smiled. He said some things that would sound threatening in any situation, but for some reason it did not feel threatening.

“I’ll see you again someday. Don’t worry. I’m on my way to come see you.” Freddy wanted to ask the other what he meant. What the meaning of all of this was, why the man was wearing a uniform, but he could not even make a sound and every time he had the dream it didn’t last long.

The dream was confusing, he really didn’t know what it meant. When he told someone they just said it meant that it was either nothing or just I’m needing to accept he was gay. Like he had not already accepted that since he figured that one out.

He didn’t know what was going on, but it wasn’t invasive or scary, so he just kept it to himself. Some structure in his life, even if it was a weird dream, he needed something.

* * *

Freddy was sitting with some of his friends, waiting for their ride to show up, just people watching until their ride showed up. He was just eating some strudel he got himself, because he had forgotten to eat again. It’s not like he didn’t feel like eating or anything, he was just busy and ended up noticing he had not eaten all day and then grabbed the nearest food he could.

His friends were talking about one thing or another, Freddy was contently just eating and looking at nothing in particular. He didn’t even notice the person coming up to him. The ma stepped up to him and Freddy only noticed when he had just stuffed his mouth full of strudel so now, he had to make haste to swallow the strudel and not choke on it.

The man just chuckled and looked at him. “I didn’t mean to startle you like this. I’m sorry.”

Freddy smiled and looked at him coughing a bit but gathering himself. “It’s fine. I wasn’t paying attention…Hello?”

“Yes Hello, I just thought you looked familiar.” The man looked at him and Freddy just looked him over for a bit to see if something was up with him.

“Well, that comes with the job, I guess. Very possibly you’ve seen me somewhere, not even registered it and now you are like: ‘I think I know you.’” He returned to his normal resting bitch face because he got this often. He got this often. It was starting to get annoying. That’s until he noticed something about the man standing in front of him. He was not paying attention to what he was saying. He noticed however that the man looked very particular, not so much in every aspect, but just in one specific one. Freddy noticed the one blind eye the man had while talking.

“So, yeah, I just thought I knew you. I’m sorry if I bothered you or something, I didn’t mean to.” Freddy shook his head and smiled, telling the man it really was no bother.

“You actually remind me of someone too. How about I give you my phone number so we can arrange a moment to actually talk about this weird thing?” The man looked at him, kind of caught of guard but he quickly nodded.

“Yes. We’ll do that.” He smiled and handed his phone over, Freddy put his number in and handed it back.

“My name’s Friedrich. Friedrich Finkel in full, but please don’t use it. It just makes things weird. Just call me Freddy like everyone else.” The man nodded and quickly text Freddy, so he had his number too.

“Seems like we share that alliteration then. It’s Kurt Klenzendorf. Honestly, just call me K. It’s much easier anyways.” He smiled and Freddy chuckled for a moment at the name when he saved the number in his phone.

They said their goodbyes and as they got up to leave Freddy got a good talking to from his friends that this situation was weird and that he was crazy to just give out his number like that. Especially when they learned he gave his real number, but he didn’t care. His friends said he was risking his life for a guy who wasn’t even that hot and probably just a crazy person.

* * *

The dreams changed.

They didn’t change a lot, but they did change.

The man now started out looking at him and as he made his way over, he gave a genuine smile. “I’ve found you. I missed you. You’re just as perfect as that faithful day.”

The man still looked the same, exactly the same. He looked exactly like the man he met and only after the dreams changed, he noticed this similarity. He still could not ask anything. The dream always ended with the man’s soft smile. And the words: “I hope it’s a better time.”

Freddy still had no idea what the dream meant, but now he was sure it was connected to that guy he met. Kurt. He looked exactly the same, but he didn’t understand why he would see a stranger. Was he also seeing him in this weird dream setting? Probably not. That would be crazy. Freddy was probably losing his mind.

* * *

The first talk over coffee he had with Kurt was, interesting. They just sat and talked about nothing, about it being weird that both of them seemed to know the other without actually knowing them. They were just talking about mainly that. Besides that, they talked about what they did. Freddy told about his modelling and that being why he was often familiar to people, which is why he also got annoyed with it. He said he had a shop, a clothing shop. According to him it was just a small thing and he took some time designing some special things himself sometimes, but more as a hobby.

“I would love to see some of it. I could show it off for you.” He only half-joked. It would be interesting and maybe there would be something fun in it.

“You are always very welcome to just stop by. I mean, please do.” The man smiled and sipped his coffee. “I mean, I would love a cute guy like you just hanging around my store. It may just attract customers.”

Freddy blushed like mad at that statement, did this guy just really call him cute? They had only just met, was he even interested in him like that. “You mean that?”

“Of course, you’re cute. People, women and men would flock to my store if you’re just in there. Then I will have to fight them off to make sure you’re still alive by the end of the day.” The man said this all so matter-of-factly. Freddy snorted and chuckled for a moment. They just talked nonsense for a while.

“I would love to see your shop then, it sounds nice.” K smiled and looked at Freddy, getting up with his coffee and smiling.

“Well, get up then. I will show you, even if I’m not open. I will make an exemption for you.” Freddy chuckled and got up to follow the man. He was still confused as to why he knew this person. Why his face was so familiar.

It was a short walk through the small town that took them to a small little shop. A small shop that K then opened the doors to and was laden with all kinds of clothing. Mainly normal, but there were sketches on the walls with various designs and Freddy looked around intrigued. Just looking at all the sketches with bright colours and accents when one of the sketches caught his eye. It looked like the uniform the man in his dream wore. “Tell me about this one, it looks fancy.”

“Oh that? It’s just a small thing. I was bored one day and just started drawing. I didn’t even think about it. I don’t know where I got the idea, probably just my time in the army speaking on how the uniforms really don’t look good enough.” He smiled at the idea and Freddy just looked at him.

Was that it then? Was this just the man from his dream, was there nothing more to it? Was there really nothing more to these dreams that had been plaguing him for years? He looked around the shop for a while. He looked at the the pin Kurt was wearing as it seemed to be drawn in a lot of the sketches too. “Interesting pin, what’s it for? Looks pretty cool.”

K looked down for a moment and smiled. “It’s not normally something people complement me for. It was my idea of a statement, taking back the symbols used to oppress people like me. I think it’s a bit too much for people.”

Freddy looked at him confused. What kind of statement do pink triangles even make. “What do you mean a statement? It’s just a pink triangle.”

“Well, time for a history lesson. This is going to make me sound absolutely mental to someone I just met but, the Nazis used pink triangles to set apart homosexuals. I think just wearing it takes the power away, but people do not like it.” He smiled and looked at him. “I don’t know why I thought it would be a good idea, but I’ve come this far with it so I feel like stopping would be weird.”

“It’s a bit strange, but a nice sentiment.” He smiled and looked at the man before breaking the silence with a question. “Does that mean you’re gay then?”

“Yes.” The man said it so matter-of-factly that Freddy was slightly taken aback. “I’ve been for all my life.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t have guessed, but okay.” He smiled and looked at him awkwardly. “I don’t mean that in a bad way, I mean… I’m not anti-gay… I’m gay myself. I’m talking myself into a hole.”

K laughed at him and smiled again. “It’s okay, I’m used to people getting all flustered when I tell them. I’ve accepted that years ago. I’m not flamboyant enough for it to be obvious, so people get confused.”

“I mean, it’s not like people can smell it on me, but most people just assume.” He smiled and looked at the other again. “I guess I’m just a mess.”

“If you are a mess, that makes two of us.” He smiled and put some things away sitting down for a moment. “It’s kind of weird that both of us seem to know each other. I have no idea how that even works, but I guess it seems to.”

“You act like I know what’s going on with that. I really don’t. It’s just as strange to me as it is to you.” He smiled sweetly, just looking at him, trying to understand what was even going on with this.

“I don’t know, it’s like I’ve known you all my life. I don’t know what it is. It’s strange. Don’t get creeped out by what I’m going to say.” He sighed and looked at him. “I don’t believe in soulmates or any of that shit, but if there is a feeling that is it of a soulmate. This would be it.”

Freddy was taken aback by this statement, they’d only just met. Had they? They had. They met in the station. “I’m sorry that’s just…slightly weird. I…”

“I’m sorry, It’s not like weird. I don’t mean romantic necessarily. I just. I fucked this up, but the truth is honestly even weirder.” Kurt looked at him and Freddy tried to smile, but he was honestly weirded out in this moment.

“Tell me, it can’t be much weirder than meeting a man who tells you you’re his soulmate less than a week later.” Freddy was starting to get a bit nervous, but the man sighed.

“Truth is, and you are going to think I am absolutely crazy for this. As in, send me to the psych ward right now, crazy.” He looked at the floor as Freddy stood there and he continued. “Truth is, from the moment I saw you, you look exactly like someone I’ve been seeing in my dreams for years. I don’t know why, but he’s always there and he looks exactly like you and keeps telling me to find him. Then when we met it changed to say: ‘Finally we’re together again. It’s been so long’. And I honestly think I should just check myself into a psych hospital at this point.”

Freddy just stood there, confused. Not even scared anymore. He was just baffled. “What did you just say?”

“Completely crazy, not?” Kurt looked up and was even more confused than Freddy to see him still standing there.

“Not crazier than the exact same thing happening to me. Well not exact. You say things like ‘I’ll see you again someday.’ And ‘I hope it’s a better time for us’ and I honestly thought I had gone crazy.” He looked at Kurt and he just stared back before standing up.

“You know what that means right?” Freddy shook his head and just looked at him, speechless “Well, it means we are both crazy.” 

Freddy let out a chuckled at that. “We can let out our crazy ramblings over dinner or something if you want. You know, we can order some food and just…ramble about us being crazy.”

“Sounds good, let’s do that.” Kurt smiled and got up, looking at Freddy. “My place is right around the corner, I think that would be easiest.”

* * *

“You know, my friends would call me crazy for going to a stranger’s house after they said something like that.” He followed the man and as they entered his home Freddy just looked around. “Nice place, much more hipster than I would have expected from someone like you.”

“Everyone says that, all the time, in pretty much that exact tone of voice.” Kurt walked over and stepped inside motioning for the other to follow him. “Anything in particular you want to order?”

Freddy shook his head and just looked around for a bit, looking at some of the pictures on the walls. “I just mean it’s really nice. I like it.”

Freddy looked at him and Kurt smiled and invited Freddy in further. “So just say what you want to order, we’ll order whatever you want, I’m easy when it comes to that stuff.”

Freddy sat down and thought for a while just looking at him. “How about we just talk for a second, before we make dinner commitments.”

Kurt nodded and sat down with him, it was kind of awkward at first, but as the started talking they noted their dreams had a lot in common. Both were set in a mess of a town with crumbled buildings all around and chaos making up most of the noise in the dream. Not being able to ask questions was also a common thing between them. They talked pretty much through the night and wen Freddy noticed the time he chuckled. “You know, we forgot to order dinner.”

“I guess we’re a bit late for that now.” Kurt smiled and looked at him. “I can always see if there is anything to make? I probably still have something edible laying around.”

“It’s okay. I just meant that it is really getting late and I should maybe leave before it gets too late. Don’t want to keep you.” He looked at Kurt and smiled, getting up off the couch.

Kurt stood up and followed him, looking at Freddy and as they took some time saying goodbye, they just looked at each other for a moment. Neither of them really wanted to say goodbye at this point, but they knew they had to. Instead of saying goodbye Kurt leaned in to kiss Freddy and even though he was caught off guard, he returned the favour gladly. Freddy ran his hand through the man’s hair and Kurt held the man close to him. It got heated quickly and they scrambled to get back into the house and over to the bedroom.

Freddy was fiddling with the other’s belt the whole way back to the bedroom, he had no idea what came over him as he normally was not like this. He wasn’t into random hook-ups like this, but it felt right.

* * *

The dreams were weird.

They didn’t change even more, but they continued on from where they left off. They continued from the point where the man was telling him he had found him. They left off from the point where the man told him he hoped it would be a better time.

He still could not ask the person any questions. He was sure he was never going to get answers from the person in his dreams, but at this point he was closer. The man was not only closer, but he was holding him. Hugging him. Whispering into his hair.

“I wish it could have been different for us the first time.”

“I wish it could have turned out better.”

“I wish we could have loved like we did without fear.”

“I wish we made it.”

"I promise you, with everything I can imagine and everything I can say that I love you."

The man just held him and somewhere in Freddy’s mind, it was comforting. Feeling this man hold him was a familiar feeling. It felt real. It felt like a feeling he recognized. A smell of smoke and whiskey that felt familiar to him for some reason he did not quite understand.

“I wish it could have gone right the first time, I love you. I always have. You mean the world to me. You brightest spot in the darkest times we went through, and I didn’t say it enough. You were perfect… You are perfect.”

Freddy felt so comfortable in this person’s arms even I he wasn’t real.

Even if it was not true.

* * *

Freddy woke up in a place he didn’t immediately recognize. It was nice, it was warm, and it smelled familiar. Like he hadn’t woken up. He snuggled himself closer against the warm mass he was already snuggled against.

The mass moved. Not something Freddy had expected to happen, when he was softly told to not wake up and not worry. This however, just made Freddy look up. “hmmm?”

“I guess you’re awake now.” Kurt looked at him and kissed the top of Freddy’s head. “Just lay down I just was going to have a smoke, you’re still in my house so I’m not going anywhere.”

“No…” Freddy held onto him and just didn’t want him to get out of bed, the feeling was so familiar he just wanted to hold onto it. “don’t go.”

Kurt wrangled himself out of the other’s arms a bit and got up. Freddy was sorely disappointed. “I’ll be back in a minute. Don’t worry.”

Freddy watched him leave and only then did the realization happen that one, he was in this man’s bed and two, he was not actually dressed. He just held onto the blanket realizing that he was probably being weird again. Kurt actually did come back quite soon and slid back into bed next to Freddy.

“I’m back, see. No worries.” He smiled and stroked his hand through Freddy’s hair. “I just hope you’re not too sad that I went to have a smoke. I tried to let you sleep through it.”

“I’m fine.” Freddy snuggled back into him without a second thought and looked up at him. “I’m sorry if I’m being too intrusive.”

“Yeah, we’re a bit too late for that.” Kurt smiled and kissed the top of Freddy’s head again. “I have already as intrusive last night as I could have been with you.”

“Yeah…I remember. It was nice though I must admit.” He just held onto the other, smiling. “You know, normally I don’t like it when people smell like smoke, but I like it.”

Freddy just held onto Kurt again and sighed into his chest, smiling and just snuggling against him again. “I had one of those dreams again. It felt so close to this exact feeling. It’s strange. I don’t know why it’s like this.”

“I was just about to say something like that. The weirdest thing was when he said he wished it could have been a different time for us. It’s weird.” Freddy looked up at Kurt when he said it.

“My dream said the same thing…He hugged me and said he wished things could have turned out better.” Kurt looked at him and kissed him, holding him close. Freddy just listened to the other’s heartbeat for a moment.

“I think we’re having the same dreams, but with different people.” Kurt slowly stroked a hand through Freddy’s hair for a moment just being together for a moment. “You look very comfortable like this.”

“It’s because I am very comfortable.” He smiled and looked up at him and snuggled back against him “I don’t want to leave. I like being like this. You’re comfortable.”

He smiled and kissed him again, when he noticed his phone buzzing somewhere on the floor. “Uuuugh, is that necessary?”

He sighed and leaned off the edge of the bed, grabbing his trousers and taking his phone out of the pocket. He saw it was one of his friends and lay back down with his head on the pillows, answering the phone call as he lay down. “Hello? Freddy here.”

“Freddy, what the fuck? Where are you?” Freddy didn’t have any jobs scheduled for today, so his friends were being weird again. “We’ve not heard from you in like two days, complete radio silence.”

“Yeah, sorry. I have no jobs scheduled for a bit and I thought I could just rest for a moment. I’m sorry.” He rubbed his eyes for a moment, trying to wake himself up better.

“I would have been less upset if you didn’t just skip out o the party yesterday without saying anything. Was that guy so weird that you needed to take a dramatic bath or something?” He sighed and looked at Kurt laying next to him making stupid faces and chuckled for a moment.

“Not exactly. I’ll explain sometime, but I’m doing something.” He looked at him and smiled for a moment, Kurt stroked a hand through his hair and smiled.

“You fucked him, didn’t you?” Freddy looked annoyed and sighed.

“Look I will see you tomorrow or something. I’m busy. Bye.” He hung up before she could say anything and put the phone away, turning back over to lay back down on the other’s chest. “I’m just going to lay here for a little while. If you don’t mind.”

Kurt shook his head and smiled, contently stroking Freddy’s hair for a while, until he moved and kissed him. “You’re amazing.”

“Thank you, but that’s not true. You said something about us having the same dreams about different people. What do you mean?” Freddy just held on to the other and smiled. “Because that sounds like an interesting theory.”

“Yeah, I mean. They’re very similar. It’s so strange they are, what made you okay with yesterday? You even told me you don’t normally just do casual sex like that?” Freddy groaned and held on to the other.

“yeah, I have no idea. I mean, I don’t do that, it just felt right. I honestly, don’t know.” He smiled and closed his eyes for a moment. “You feel familiar, like we’ve already had that awkward, get to know each other phase.”

Kurt smiled and held him close, kissing the top of his head and smiling. “That sounds sappy, I like it. Now, how about I make some breakfast for us then?”

“As long as we just get to sit down, watch some dumb tv programmes or something and just be.” He smiled and looked at him again. “I just have an urge to just be with you.”

“Of course, you will need to get dressed then. I’m particularly against seeing you naked the whole day, buy I want to be the only one with that nice of a view.” Kurt smiled and got out of bed, getting dressed and leaving Freddy to blush in the mess of pillows and sheets. “I’ll be in the kitchen, just come to the living room when you’re done.”

Freddy nodded and as Kurt left the room, he smiled at the ceiling closing his eyes for a moment, just thinking about what had happened. The place where Kurt had just been smelled nice and familiar, like he had returned home after a long time. The smell hit him with some recollection of the dreams he had, of the man and his fancy uniform. He remembered the detail of a pink triangle being sewn on the breast pocket of the man’s uniform and he suddenly looked up. He rubbed his head for a bit and got dressed to try and get away from that weird realization for a moment.

Freddy stepped into the living room and in the morning light it looked no different, like he’d lived here all his life. He had this nostalgic feeling for something he knew he had never experienced, and it was the weirdest feeling ever. He did not understand why he felt like this. Everything felt like he’d been here before, like he’d lived here, maybe in another life.

“Breakfast is ready, sit down okay. I’m not the best cook, but I can manage to crack an egg into a pan so that’s something right?” Kurt put a plate down in front of Freddy as he sat down and sat down himself. “I hope you like it.”

Freddy smiled and looked at him again, looking at the plate. “I think I’m going to beat you when it comes to crazy statements we randomly make.”

“Oh, do tell. I would be happy to be taken over in the amount of crazy I am.” He smiled and took a bite from his breakfast, while Freddy cleared his throat.

“I think, it’s you in my dreams.” Kurt was about to take a sip of water and looked at him. “Is that crazy enough for you?”

“Sounds like I’m not the weird one out of the two of us anymore.” He smiled and took a sip before continuing. “Why do you think it’s me?”

“For one, the eye. I don’t know a whole lot of people with one blind eye.” Kurt nodded and smiled for Freddy to continue on with what he was saying. “Also, just the general features, it really looks like you. Along with the pin you wear, but instead sewn into the breast pocket of whatever uniform this dream version of you is wearing.”

Kurt put the glass down and looked at him again, he looked confused for a moment but got up from the table and smiled. “Wait for a moment okay, I’m going to show you something even weirder.”

“Is this a fucking competition?” Freddy chuckled and took a bite from his food, smiling and looking after him.

“You made it a competition, Freddy. So, I’m going to show you how crazy I can get.” He stepped out of the room and Freddy looked after him

“No stabbing!” He chuckled and continued eating for a while, until Kurt came back with a sketchbook.

“Does, per chance, the man’s uniform look similar to this?” He opened the sketchbook and handed it over.

“EXACTLY!” Freddy shouted this uncharacteristically loudly and looked at it. “Less feathers on the hat, but yes exactly that. How did you?”

“I came up with it… I don’t remember when. It was a while ago. I was planning to make the most gaudy outfit I possibly could. I don’t remember if it was for another one of my misplaced statements or just a general fun project, but it stayed a drawing.”

“If it looks as good as it does in my dream, it will look amazing on you. Very powerful.” He smiled and looked at him. “You and your statements.”

“Seems most people don’t care enough about me being gay for statements to be warranted. I am cursed to be in a generation that is mostly accepting while I have the mind of an activist.” He chuckled and kissed him again. “Better that than be in a time where everyone hates me, and I am forced to hide my sexuality so much I stop giving a fuck if I die.”

“That was specific.” Freddy looked at him and smiled, pushing the empty plate away from himself and taking a sip of water.

“Imagine that though, being like us, and having to hide from literally everything and everyone. It’s not just the stray old person or weirdo who has a grudge. It’s everyone. I don’t know if it would be better or worse to find love in that situation. Because you have each other, but you can’t show off the person you love to the world.” He shrugged and looked at Freddy for a moment. “I’m sorry I’m rambling.”

“I don’t think it’s rambling. If we’ve been having the same dreams you’ve been bombarded with the idea of: ‘I hope, it’s a better time’ as well.” He smiled and looked at him, smiling a little bit. “You seem like the person who would just make it a better place himself.”

“Well, not that it was that much work here. I seem to have got the right friends. I mean, my coming out was pretty much, ‘Guys I want to tell you people.’ ‘Whose dick did you suck?’ ‘My boyfriend’s’ and that was that.” He chuckled and put the plates together “It’s funny at least.”

He smiled and grabbed the plates to bring them away. “Mine wasn’t more eventful than: ‘Tell us something we don’t know.’”

Kurt took the plates and put them in the kitchen. He came back and quickly gave Freddy a kiss. “You know, I’m glad you don’t think I am completely crazy.”

They smiled and looked at each other for a while before Freddy looked back at the sketchbook and the sketch of the man. “What are you wearing in the dreams?”

Freddy looked up and thought for a moment. “Something equally gaudy. Long cape with like, pink party flags. Pink tassels on the boots. All the buttons are pink as well. I don’t exactly remember, I pay more attention to the man telling me he cares about me.”

“Well, I have something for you.” Kurt grabbed the sketch book and flipped a couple of pages before sliding the book back “Is this it?”

“yes…How did you?” Kurt smiled and looked at him. “We have the same dreams, don’t we? I mean, you dream about me, I dream about you.”

Kurt nodded and smiled looking at the other. “I mean, yes. It really seems like it. I have been thinking about something about them for a while. I will come back to you with the info if I have it, because the next step is going to be boring as hell.”

“Are you going to do research?” He chuckled and looked at him giving him a quick kiss. “Well then, I have a job tomorrow anyways.”

“Good, then that’s settled.” Freddy kissed him quickly again, taking his time with it.

“I still don’t believe in soul mates though. This must be something else.” Kurt smiled and kissed him again. “something stranger.”

“Like we haven’t seen enough strange already.” Freddy smiled and held onto him. He could get used to this feeling of comfort.

* * *

Freddy had spent the rest of the day thinking. Thinking why that feeling felt so familiar to him, like he’s felt it before, even though he knew he hadn’t.

Freddy had more memories that didn’t belong to him. Well, one in particular. It wasn’t a good one and he just hoped that it was made up, from a movie or something. However, as he thought about it, he felt that same comfort he felt with Kurt. That same exact feeling when he held Kurt’s hand.

When he was done with the photoshoot one of his friends was supposed to pick him up. She was there, but it of course had to start off with a lecture. A lecture to not go home with strangers like he was a five-year-old. A lecture on why Kurt was creepy and a lecture on not even telling them where he went. Freddy grabbed his phone as it dinged, indicating a message. He was honestly just trying to ignore his friend.

‘I found something. Seems my research paid off. Want me to pick you up to show you.’

Freddy smiled at the message Kurt had sent and replied with a short. ‘yes’ and the address of where he was.

“Lau, stop lecturing me, fuck.” He sighed as he put his phone away. “Anyways, I got another right.”

“If it’s the creepy guy I’m going to just kidnap you to make sure you’re okay.” She just stared Freddy down, however Freddy did not budge.

“You know, you could just be happy that I made a connection with someone instead of lecturing me on why you think he’s creepy.” He sighed and stood with his thumbs in his pockets.

“Yeah, you met him once in a train station. Such a connection. He’s going to turn out to be a murderer or something.” She was starting to get mad and Freddy could hear it.

“Lau, I have told you before. I’ve told you about the dreams before. They have been here since the beginning. I feel comfortable with Kurt. Nothing weird. He makes the thoughts in my head stop going crazy.” He had the same dreams, he made Freddy forget about the memories of dying that were not his. He made him feel the comfort he felt at the end of the memories when someone held his hand.

“You’re going crazy, just come on. He’s already making you crazy! You see that right? I’m not allowing you to go with him.” Freddy sighed and looked at her again.

“Lau, please. You don’t know half of what is going on.” He looked at his phone as it pinged. “I’m going, he’s here.”

She looked at him and sighed. “You know, if you die, don’t tell me I did not warn you.”

“Sure, I don’t care.” He went downstairs, trying to forget about what just happened. He found Kurt waiting for him. Kurt smiled as he saw him and waited for him to join him.

“How was work?” Kurt smiled and looked at Freddy for a second, smiling and walking with him as they started. Freddy smiled softly, looking for the right words.

“Fine, friend’s being a bitch. Keeps calling you creepy.” Kurt chuckled and looked around the street as they were walking.

“I’m very creepy. I know your dreams without asking you.” Kurt said this in a low, creepy voice to enhance his point.

“So, where are we going?”

“Oh yeah, my place. I have some things I need to show you. Google is a magical thing and it makes research so easy.” Freddy chuckled and looked at him, taking his hand because it felt right for him.

“Isn’t this a bit strange?” Freddy chuckled and continued walking with him.

“yes, it feels right though. I’ll hold your hand if I want to.” Freddy held his hand a bit tighter smiling.

“Do what you want. If you like it, I’m not here to stop you.” Kurt smiled and let Freddy hold his hand, Freddy was just very happy with it.

As they stepped inside Kurt’s place he immediately went over to his laptop and told Freddy to sit down on the chair across from him. “So, tell me, does this person look familiar to you?”

He turned the laptop around and Freddy laughed at the picture. “Looks like an arty black and white picture of you. Have you been taking arty black and white photos of yourself?”

“Not exactly. Now the kicker is.” He scrolled clicked through the next picture and smiled. Freddy seemed very confused, looking at the screen intently.

“When did we take this picture? When was this?” Freddy saw himself stare back at him on the screen, a sensation he was used to, but it was different.

“This picture was taken in, let me check, March… of 1945” Freddy looked at Kurt and slapped him playfully.

“Shut the fuck up. That’s not true. That’s clearly us, right there.” Kurt pulled up the information on the picture.

“See, March 1945. This picture, of these people looking exactly like us, is now…75 years old.” He looked at Freddy and back at the picture. “I agree, it looks exactly like us. It’s strange.”

Freddy was suddenly hit by the memories he had, the memories of a death that wasn’t his. The chaos in the dreams, the sounds of bullets flying and the destruction all around him. The fear and the comfort when death came for him when someone held his hand as he drowned in his own blood. “It doesn’t look like us Kurt.”

“What do you mean? It looks exactly like us Freddy. Are you looking at it right?” Freddy shook his head and Kurt saw Freddy turn white. He put his hand on his shoulder for comfort.

“It doesn’t look like us, Kurt. It is us… It’s you and I and I don’t know how that is even possible.” Kurt smiled and kissed the top of Freddy’s head to try and comfort him.

“Freddy, it just looks like us, or well, we look like them. It’s nothing to worry about, it happens. I didn’t mean to scare you.

“I have memories I could never place; the dreams and the surroundings were always a mystery. I have memories of a person that is not me. I have memories of dying, memories of the fear of never waking up. Memories of the comfort of someone holding my hand as everything faded into nothing.” Freddy looked at Kurt, tears in his eyes. He was scared to think what Kurt thought of him at this point. “I’m sorry, I sound completely mental, but it hurts. It scares me. Every time I think about it, I remember the sensation of drowning… It can’t be real, I know it can’t, but it feels real.”

Kurt held Freddy in his arms, kissing his cheek and smiling at him, trying to calm him down. “Don’t worry, Freddy. You’re not crazy. I believe you.”

“How can you believe me?” Freddy looked at Kurt, who looked at him serious. He kissed his cheek and smiled.

“I told you, you can not out crazy me. I have them too. Not as vivid, but I remember something. I remember looking a group of men in the eyes, no regrets left. Then nothing. I checked and besides them having the exact names we do, which could be a coincidence as Kurt and Friedrich are not very rare names, the one that looks like me was executed by firing squad at the end of the war.”

Freddy looked at Kurt for a moment and hugged him tight, as if he was never going to let go. “Thank you…”

Freddy wanted to say much more at that point, but he physically couldn’t. He was starting to tear up, holding onto the other man, who felt so familiar. He now knew why he felt familiar, it was familiar. He was probably his friend or something, someone close to him during an awful period.

“I also looked a bit deeper. It’s honestly amazing what is still archived about these things. I was wondering what they did and at least, I found out one thing. They were involved with a local chapter of the Jugend which, is a weird thought.” He looked at Freddy and smiled. “Besides that, there’s not a lot known about them.”

Freddy was honestly not listening for the moment. He was holding on to Kurt, wanting to be with him like this forever. He could care less who they were, he was just happy to have someone who understood what it felt like to have memories of a death that wasn’t yours.

“I was looking into them more, but I couldn’t find anything. Well I could. I found someone.” Freddy looked at him and smiled. 

“What does that mean?” He held on to Kurt, just not wanting to let him go.

“Well, I found a lady. Because I looked through a registry and stuff. I checked what families were still in town here. Maria Betzler. I sent her an e-mail, I haven’t gotten one back yet. I wanted to meet her, maybe she heard some family stories or something. Would be interesting.” He kissed him for a moment and smiled.

“It would be interesting for sure, I just want to know that I wasn’t an absolute douche or something worse. That I deserve this second chance.” He kissed Kurt again, smiling, holding on to the bliss he felt at this moment.

They talked about their weird memories, they talked about liking each other. They were talking about what they were of each other at that time. They wondered if their relationship now was related to whatever they were back then. It took a while before they got their answer from the lady.

Kurt did a bit of a drumroll on the table. “You ready to hear what’s come out of my wild goose chase for someone who probably doesn’t exist anymore, and I just connected two last names that are the same, but are not related?”

“Well, please do. Do not hold me in this mystery any longer.” He kissed him and smiled. In the last week Freddy felt like he practically moved in with Kurt. He was sitting in his pj’s holding a cup of hot chocolate looking at Kurt as he drum rolled the table. “I can’t hold the tension anymore.”

Freddy chuckled and looked at Kurt who was attentively reading whatever he was reading. “Well I’ve got good news and even better news.”

“Well, tell me then.” He walked over to sit on a chair next to Kurt, leaning his head on his shoulder and smiling for a moment.

“Well, first, she’s fine with talking to us about is. I said it was for a bit of a project by the way. As her grandfather has told her many stories. However, she’s spoken to him as he’s still alive, and when she mentioned the people, we were asking about he seemed very excited to talk to us himself.” He looked at him and smiled. “Sounds like we’re going to learn about whatever they were from a source.”

“When are we going then?” He smiled and kissed Kurt before he could answer.

“I’ll try to settle for next week if that’s okay” Kurt smiled and looked at him.

“Yeah, sounds good. So, we’re going to hang out with an old man in a week. Fun.” He smiled and looked at Kurt, half sarcastically.

“It’s going to be interesting. I mean if he was excited and did not immediately have crazy Vietnam style flashbacks, it must not be terrible memories.” He kissed him and smiled again, looking at him longingly.

“Where did you find this person? Because that is what I’m wondering at this point.” He put his cup down and kissed him again.

“The jugend registry. I checked the names with people still in town. Betzler was practically the only one actually left. If I remember right, he had to be like…ten at the end of the war. Which just means that they have to be very vivid memories.” He smiled and started typing a reply before quickly sending it off.

“This is just going to be weird isn’t it? This lady is going to think we’re trying to scam her grandfather or something, isn’t she?” Kurt closed his laptop and grabbed Freddy close to himself.

“Well, probably. It’s going to be weird.” He kissed his neck for and just smiled against his neck. “You smell nice you know that? I like it so much it drives me mad.”

“I don’t mind driving you mad, as long as you take me into that equation, I’m fine with it.” He smiled and blushed at the touch.

“You’re perfect Freddy.” Kurt smiled and kissed him again, holding Freddy as close as he possibly could. They kissed each other and just wanted to be together. It seemed so little to ask for, but it felt like such a big thing to them.

* * *

The week until they were to meet the man who could shed light on some of the things, they wondered about passes extraordinarily slowly. This was mainly because they were thinking about it pretty much every day. What were the even going to say to this man?

The day of, Kurt woke Freddy as gently as he could. Freddy hadn’t been at is own place for a few days and there was always an extra set of his clothing taking up space in the other’s closet. Kurt didn’t seem to mind this at all. Kurt did not seem to mind this at all. Freddy was particularly nervous for this day, mainly because he had been psyching himself out on possibly giving a random old man a heart attack.

They took their time getting ready that morning, eating breakfast, drinking coffee and watching a movie until the time came, they had to leave to go and meet the man.

It was not very far away, only a couple of streets over from Kurt’s house. The man lived so close and there was a good choice they had seen the man around town before, never imagining speaking to this person.

As they got there and knocked on the door a young lady opened, greeting them and smiling before she suddenly looked at them all serious.

“Let me get one thing straight.” She looked at them and was very intimidating when she said this. “If you are here to scam my grandpa or anything like that, I will kick you in the balls so hard you will feel it until the day you die, which won’t have to be long because I will kill you soon after, got it?”

“You’re a feisty one, aren’t you? Don’t worry, we’re not here to scam him.” K looked at her for a moment.

“Don’t call me feisty, because I am going to soon decide if I kick you in the balls anyways.” She went back inside telling them to come in as she went into what they presumed to be the living room. Freddy closed the door behind himself.

“Grandpa, those people I told you about are here.” She stepped aside in the living room picking a glass up to take a sip of a drink she had.

As they stepped into the living room it was decorated very homely. There was an elderly man sitting in a recliner, he looked pretty good for reportedly being 85 years of age. Grey, thin but curly hair, bright blue eyes. Looking more lively than any other 85-year olds Freddy had seen, honestly, he had not seen a lot of them. “Thank you, dear. Right on time.”

As the man looked at them, he looked very thoughtfully at the both of them. Freddy stood awkwardly close to Kurt, mainly because he felt really weird being here. The man just stared at them before he cleared his throat and spoke up. “Maria, could you be a dear and leave me to speak to these gentlemen alone? I have some errands if you would run them for me?”

“Are you sure? They’re still random strangers who e-mailed me out of the blue.” She looked at Freddy and K for a moment.

“Yes, It’s my house. I know where all the knives are remember?” She smiled and nodded, looking at him. “Remember, they’re hidden in the walls.”

“I remember, I’ll be a bit then.” She took the small paper from him and smiled. “I’ll be back soon enough then. Still, be careful.”

As Maria left the man looked at them with a warm smile “Please, have a seat. Don’t mind Maria too much, she’s a feisty one. Reminds me of my mother actually. Hates me for saying so.”

Kurt sat down and Freddy sat down next to him, without thinking about it he sat as close as he could. This was mainly because Freddy felt extremely awkward being here. He was even here to ask questions about really strange things as well, how would he even explain this? It did not even make sense to himself if he was completely honest.

“So, gentlemen. What are you here for?” The man sat back for a moment before he spoke again. “Oh, where are my manners. My name is Johannes Betzler.”

Freddy just smiled and did a small wave when Kurt spoke up. “My name is Kurt Klenzendorf, and this is…”

“Freddy Finkel, I can only guess. Either you did your homework or by coincidence look a loot like them.” The man really was lively for an 85-year-old man.

“Yes, but how on earth did you know?” The man flashed a cheeky grin and looked both of them over for a moment.

“Well, Maria told me you wanted to ask about some people from during the war because you found the name Betzler in the Jungvolk registry. She said you wanted to ask about Captain K and Finkel. You two also look scarily like them. I just want you to forgive me for any lapses in memory. It has of course been 75 years and I was only 10 at the time.” The man said this so matter-of-factly. It took both of them by surprise for a moment. “Are you two related to them?”

“With the last names it seems likely. However, I just want to be sure I was not accidentally named after a really bad person or something like that. Especially not a Nazi” Kurt seemingly had even thought of an excuse as to why they were there, talk about thinking smart. He also seemed much more comfortable talking to strangers.

“With the knowledge and perspective, I have gained over the past years, I am very confident in saying they were both good men and certainly not Nazis.” The man sighed for a moment. “Their actions at the time and things I realized afterwards, speak so much louder than what anyone could say about them.”

“Just tell us what you know, we’re just interested in their story.” Kurt smiled, taking Freddy’s hand to calm Freddy’s nerves, it happened completely out of instinct. The man smiled, but they were not sure about what.

“I didn’t know them for very long, only about half a year if I am correct, something along those lines. Captain K was overseeing a youth training camp and if I am right that is where I saw them first. Finkel was his assistant.” The man thought for a moment, before smiling like he was recalling the best time of his life. “Then, because I blew myself up with a grenade he got demoted.”

“Well that took a turn I did not expect to hear.” Freddy let the words out before he could stop himself.

“The weirder part is that the demotion was due to child neglect and yes he was made to supervise the local chapter of Jungvolk and Jugend here in Falkenheim. In all reality I ran up to him, stole the grenade, threw it against my tree an blew myself up with it. It wasn’t his fault. I mean who would expect a ten-year-old barrelling out of the woods to grab a grenade.” He smiled and looked at them. “To think that action saved me from ending up as a child soldier because they regarded me as crippled.”

“Well I want to say you’re lucky then, but you still blew yourself up with a grenade.” Kurt looked at him rubbing the back of Freddy’s hand without even realizing it.

“Back to the captain and Finkel. They did a couple of things, that over the years after convinced me that they couldn’t possibly be bad. First, they saved the lives of me and a good friend of mine for one, by lying to the gestapo. I remember that moment very vividly. They asked for her papers, which she did not have. She gave the ones of my sister, which she looked like a bit, but the captain checked those papers. She gave the wrong date of birth, he said it was right. He was also only there because he ran in with a bicycle proclaiming the tire was flat.” He looked at them grinning again. “I don’t think it was actually flat.”

“Wait, why did she need to use your sister’s papers?” The man took a bit to look for the words. It took a while, but a Kurt was about to say something he spoke.

“The girl, the good friend of mine who was using the papers, was being hidden in the walls by my mother. You see, she was Jewish. So, it took balls to even be out with them there. Then lying to them of course. Just lucky Captain K noticed they came in and took that.” He sighed and looked at the both of them. “It was the dumbest thing a group of people have ever done and would have surely gotten all of us killed if they asked to double check, but we were insanely lucky in that moment.”

“Sounds like a good person at least. Lying to people who would literally kill someone for breathing weirdly to save someone he didn’t even know.” Freddy looked at Kurt for a moment and then at the elderly man again.

“It’s not even the only thing.” The man thought for a moment again. “He also saved my life, at the end of it all. It was a very strange moment. At the time I didn’t understand, but I obsessed over that moment when I was a young man and realized what had happened.”

Freddy was actually quite interested in all these stories, it was strangely comforting to hear about this man he’d been seeing in his dreams and that he wasn’t a giant dick.

“At the end of the war, just after the dust had settled. I was aimlessly wandering. I had a Wehrmacht tunic put on me as a prevention to not be shot by the Germans. I was just trying to figure out what to do. Then some Russian soldier grabbed me by the shoulder dragging me to where they held other soldiers prisoner temporarily. When I was put there, captain K was there. He was at that point, besides Elsa, the only one I had left. He hugged me, I am pretty sure he was trying to shield me from seeing something bad. Then, without me noticing he had taken off my jungvolk hat. Then he stood me up, looking me over. Telling me to take care of my sister.” Johannes looked like he was searching for the words and for the first time in his story he looked sad about the situation he was describing. “He pulled the tunic off of me, shoved me away and started to pretty much curse me out for being a Jew. He got socked in the face and I was taken away kicking and screaming, but it was to safety. He was taken away and shot… It took me years to realize he was only doing that because the Russians would shoot a child because he was wearing the wrong coat. He saved my life, costing his own. However, I don’t think he minded that.”

“Why would he not mind dying? Why would he be okay with being lined up and shot dead by the Russians?” Kurt was taken aback looking at the man with open mouth. “I understand he would be fine with saving a child’s life, but why would he be just okay with dying.”

“That’s where the next issue comes in. There were, let’s say, other reasons why I don’t believe he was on board with the regime, at all.” He looked at the two again, sighing about something. “Forgive me if I don’t put this in the nicest way I could. Captain K and Freddy were good men, but they acted slightly off at certain points. Nothing that I noticed or even realized at the time. It took me another ten to realize why they would not be on board.”

“What was it then? Because now you’re just making us more and more curious.” Freddy looked at him, getting more and more comfortable here.

“They were always together, which wasn’t weird because of course because Freddy was captain K’s assistant. However, at that last day, when the war was going to end anyways, they were wearing something that would have sadly at the time meant they got killed no matter who won.” He looked at them trying to gauge their reaction, he was however surprised when Freddy was just staring at him with big eyes and Kurt went to grab something out of his bag.

“Per any magical minor chance. Were they wearing something along the lines of this?” He handed the sketchbook over for a moment.

The man grabbed the sketchbook and looked through it for a moment. He smiled at the pictures like they were a fond memory of his. “Well, these were not exactly what they were wearing, but certainly what they showed me for their idea of the outfits… Told me they were copyrighted. Stole their coloured pencils in return, for Elsa. I hope they were not too mad at that.”

The man laughed for a second, really recalling this memory fondly. “Yes however, they were. Including these pink triangles which I only realized later likely meant they were gay. The reason why he didn’t mid dying I think is because Freddy was nowhere around there. He was likely already dead. So, he’d already lost his lover at that point. In hindsight it was really obvious because they were always together, practically living together, looking at each other lovingly. Things like that. The worst part is that they wouldn’t even have been safe after the war. It took another couple of decades for people to just stop worrying about what other people do. I’m happy they found each other though. They deserved it, honestly.”

“You’re telling me, we are named for two gay men who saved lives and died in gloriously camp outfits in world war two?” Kurt looked at them and smiled again.

“Yes, and if anything.” He looked between the two of them. “I am convinced that if second chances exist in this world, they deserve one now. To just exist like they could not at the time, really a shame. I posed the question when I was around twenty, I think. Why we were still practically saying the Nazis were right about homosexual people… No one liked to hear that, I got kind of a bad reputation for that for a while. However, now we’re here and I am all the way down to grandchildren and through one of my other grandchildren than Maria on my way to a great grandchild even.”

“You can keep the drawings if you want. I have a digital copy at home. You seem to be glad seeing it.” The man looked up from the drawing and smiled

“That’s very nice of you, this was kind of erased from history…don’t want to make the bad guys relatable because turns out they also had to hide.” He looked around for a moment. “Then I know you’re going to say no, but I want to give you something.”

The man got up as he put the sketches on the table to retrieve a box from the bookshelf behind them. Sliding it out and looking at what was in it. He walked back and took a knife out of the box. “I gave this to Elsa when I got older and found it again, I thought it would make an interesting gift. She ended up giving it back to me after her death.”

He was standing in front of Kurt and held the small knife by the sheathed blade. He looked at it before he looked at Kurt tapping the hilt to his head. “Look after this knife.”

He put it back in the box handing it over and Kurt just smiled at this weird small interaction. “You’re right it’s too much.”

“It’s really not, since I technically got the knife from Captain K to start with. See it as me giving it back, and if I keep it my family won’t know the story behind it…” He smiled and looked at the two of them for a moment. “I hope you got your second chance. I’m happy you found each other. Keep it.”

“Why don’t you just tell your family about the story then?” Freddy looked at the man and smiled looking at him.

“It’s not that significant to them. They don’t need to know about the things I did or believed, or the girl my mom hid in the wall as they just know her as aunt Elsa. They asked me where I got the scars and I said I blew myself up with a grenade and they did not believe me. They would not believe that my mother was hiding a Jewish girl in our wall, while I was being dropped off for odd jobs. They also would not believe that two men dressed up in garish outfits, coming out as gay in the last leg of the war. My stories are too outlandish I think.” He looked at them for a moment. “Keep it please, it would mean a lot to me, just knowing it ended up back with the man who saved my life.”

“You understand that it’s not actually directly me, right?” Kurt looked from Freddy to Johannes and looked confused at the people.

“Yes, well. If it’s not, it’s one hell of a coincidence you know what these outfits looked like and of course, the fact that you’re blind in the exact same eye. Also, the way you two look at each other, the way you’ve just been holding his hand this whole time without even noticing.” As Kurt grabbed the box the man went to sit back down. “At any rate you two are what they deserved to be. Take it.”

As Kurt and Freddy looked at each other for a moment they heard the door open. Kurt put the box in his bag and Maria stepped back into the room. “You just wanted me to leave for a couple of hours did you not?”

“Yes, of course I did.” He smiled and looked at his granddaughter. “I just wanted to talk to these young men in private, about things you do not need to know about.”

“Thanks grandpa.” She sighed and looked at the two again. “They behaved right?”

“Yes, very well. They just wanted to know what I knew about that man Captain K I told you about remember?” He looked at her for a moment.

“You tell so many stories, it’s hard to keep them straight.” He looked at the two of them for a moment and the smiled.

“We should go. We’ve learned a lot. Thank you, sir.” Freddy followed Kurt closely as they stood up and before they left the room Johannes smiled and called to them.

“You know, even the mannerisms are exactly as I remember. Feel free to come by whenever you want to talk about things.” He smiled and waved at them as they said their goodbyes.

They left the house to some of the judgemental glances of Maria who closed the door behind them. They walked back to Kurt’s house in silence. When they closed the door behind them Kurt just looked at Freddy for a moment. It wasn’t an awkward silence, just a content one.

It took both of them a while to find the right words for the situation.

“I did not expect that.” Kurt looked at Freddy for a moment, he stroked his hand over Freddy’s face. “It seems like that is what that better time meant.”

“It seems so, Kurt.” Freddy didn’t even notice he was starting to tear up while smiling without an end in sight. “Do you think we planned this.”

“I hope, with all my heart, that I promised you I would find you again in a better time. I do not know, I do not remember, but I hope I did and kept that promise, because it seems we have found that better time then.” He smiled and wiped some of the tears from Freddy’s eyes. He was pretty much balling at this moment.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m crying. I just…You make me feel comfortable and I didn’t understand why and if this is true. It’s cleared up the whole memories I could not have possibly had thing too. I just…” He pulled himself against the other, burying his head in the other’s neck.

“I hope with everything in my life that I made that promise, because I intend to keep it for however long we may live.”

**Author's Note:**

> Have this utter trash. I hope you like this garbage I spewed onto the ever lasting internet yet again.  
> I love you people and this fandom.  
> Hope you're happy with my trash <3


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